Maybe It’s Faulty by Rubbermatt
“Not a chance Doc, this thing was fully calibrated before we headed out, I’m telling you the background count in this place is one tick every twenty minutes.”
“Damn.
Any sightings?”“No creepy critters since those shiny dolls were first sighted.
Looks like they’ve driven all the nasties off.”“No sightings of those?”
“Nah, they’re too fast & elusive, you only see them when they want to be seen.
Probably watching me bumbling around right now.”“That doesn’t worry you at all?”
“A few weeks back, when they first showed up, one of the spindlies nearly got me, I was out of breath & it was gaining on me.
Then two dolls appeared out of nowhere & utterly demolished it, in perfect unison, blows & kicks with blinding fast precision.
I swear the thing looked terrified, right before a double knee strike crushed its head.
As they started to drag it away one of them turned & looked straight at me, I gave a courtly bow, as best i could in this damn suit, she gave me a cute little curtsey then skipped away like I had just made her day.
So, no Doc, I ain’t worried about if the dolls are watching me, in fact I feel safer with them around.”
Okay, back at the hall of pillars … oh hello."
“What’s happening?”
“Check my video feed Doc, there’s a shiny doll here.”
“You caught her unawares?”
“Not with that supermodel strut, she wants to be see .. correction, they want to be seen, there are multiple dolls in this location.
Didn’t appreciate the last time just how gracefully they move …”
“WHHOOOAAHHH”
“What?! What’s happening??”
“Chill Doc, just one of the dolls snuck round behind me, copped a feel and a slap of the old gluteus maximus.”
“She wha … how close is she?”
“I can clearly see myself reflected on her helmet & frankly magnificent breasts.”
“I … can you describe what she looks like, please?”
" A rather curvaceous, long legged humanoid female clad entirely from head to toe in what appears to be glossy black latex.
The suit covers every inch of her body & seems to be completely seamless, her head is enclosed in an integral smooth featureless ovoid helmet … pirouetting for me, no sign of a fastener, but faint transient ripples at the joints as she moves.
I’d say an extremely snug, form fitting hi-tech suit.
I’d just like to go on the record … thank you for the impromptu fashion show and for saving my life the other week. I genuinely thought I was done for."“And …”
“Blowing me a kiss … and she’s away with a cheeky wave & a saucy sway of the hips.
Guess she likes my butt.”
“Now that’s the kind of girl your mother warned you about.”
“I know, I’ve been looking for her my whole life.”
“You really are quite hopless aren’t you ….. hang on, air analyzer on your suit reports …. mixed scent … jasmine …. teak wood … tentative match as a Chanel blend. Oh, and latex.”
“Daaammmnnn …”
“Little-miss-spanks-men’s-butts has got style.
No idea what she see’s in you.”“Hey!”
“Hhooo man, that is just pure sex in motion.
For the first time I’m glad these suits are so baggy, I might be able to leave here with the tattered remnants of my dignity intact.”“Thank heaven for small mercies, right?”
“Right. You know there’s something about the design of that suit, something I read about back when I was still military, some research projects that got shut down for ‘budgetary reasons’ ….”
“Oohhhh, they’re leaving.”
“What the … there’s four of them!”
“Doc you need to read the reports with a more critical eye.
If you see only a single doll it just means you haven’t spotted the other one, they always operate in pairs.
That time Janson claims one of them teleported? One doll stepped out of sight at one end of the corridor, the other stepped into view at the other end.”“That implies reliable, secure, undetectable comms …”
“I watched a pair of them kill a spindly with coordinated, precise, choreographed strikes Doc, I can buy that.”
“Damn, yeah ….. what now?”
“Buggered if I know, just remind people not to take these girls for granted.
They may be friendly, & save our lives when they can, but they’re not going to be there all the time, I don’t want our team to get reckless because they think we have some sort of guardian angels, right?”“I’ll remind everyone to stick to S.O.P.
Speaking of reckless idiots, we need you to see if you can locate Janson. He went radio silent not far from where you are now.”“Oh, wonderful.”
“You never know, we might be lucky this time & he actually got himself killed.”